Reactions

As you all may or may not know, I am a girl in mechanical engineering. I'm not making myself to be special or superior to any other person in any other program but it's just a fact of life that you don't see that every day.

When you meet people, you obviously have to go through the small talk of school and what program you're studying. It's inevitable. I think asking people what book they're currently reading is a much more interesting form of small talk. I am going to make that a thing. But of course, when I tell people what I'm studying, I get THE BEST reactions. They're usually extreme and there's always the typical ones but I've gotten some pretty atypical ones. Since I get a kick out of them, I figured you dudes might too and this is what the rest of this post entails.

1. Wide eyes. This is usually when they're trying to mask the fact that they had a reaction altogether and go on to regular answer like "Oh, are you liking it?" and "Are you living in residence?"

2. "I'm so glad there are people like you..." This comes from people who can't believe anyone would want to continue doing math voluntarily. They kind of make a joke where they're thankful that "people like me" exist because if it were up to them to do what I will be doing once
I graduate the world would start crumbling in on itself.

3. Genuine questions. There are people who know a few things about the classes I'm taking and ask how I'm finding them and all that. I like giving them feedback.

4. The future-thinkers. These are the same people that always asked what you were going to major in back when you were in high school. Now that you've got that pretty much cemented in, they move on to the next big milestone: your career. You are asked what you plan to do with your degree and where you'd like to live and basically all the questions that make you want to go back to kindergarten where everything was safe and certain.

It's always the creepy old people too

5. BOYS. WINK. This reaction is by far the creepiest and kind of the most insulting. This is where they point out that engineering is mostly filled with people with XY chromosomes. They ask for ratios of girls to guys in your classes, and, inevitably, talk about how easy it will be for me to find a boyfriend. Like whoa, who has time for a love life when you're taking these kinds of classes. That is definitely not my number one priority.

6. Doom predictors. These people know of other people who also decided that they could handle becoming an engineer but ended up doing really badly or dropping out or switching to a different program and on the outside I'm all like cool story bro but on the inside I freak out because it's not like I was a child prodigy or anything I've had to work hard and what if it's not enough and my entire life falls to pieces before my eyes.

Your turn! Tell me about the funniest or most insulting or best reactions to whatever you're doing with your life!

Jokes On You

Q. What's brown and sticky?
A. A stick.

_______


Q. What's square, green and as flat as a pancake?
A. A square, green pancake.

Literally My Favourite Joke

this is a shih tzu not appreciating my joke

A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog. It's a shih tzu.

Poll Results: March

Totally the lamest poll to date. My question was Do You Like Polls? and obviously the only people who voted on a poll were the ones who liked them. But maybe they were just being nice. All 4 of them.

First totally unanimous answer so party hats for everyone and let's celebrate!

Right now I'm contemplating this month's poll but I don't know what direction to go towards. Should I be really random? Should I go straightforward? Why don't you comment on what you want next month's poll to me so that I can do what my "audience" wants instead of what my brain randomly decides!

As for April, it's when vegetation is starting to grow again so why not figure out what everyone's favourite tree is!

Go forth and vote!

treeeeeeeees

Feast Your Eyes (Warm Bodies Review)

It went like this: my friends and I needed to see a movie and there was hardly anything good playing in the theatres. We picked Warm Bodies even though I have an aversion to zombies since they just don't make sense. (See my rant here: Why I Hate Zombies)

I AM SO GLAD THAT HAPPENED. Seriously, I loved the movie. Sure, there were some flaws like the science was not working for me but I got over that quickly since it wasn't the point of the movie. Here are my thoughts in blurbs about the movie:

There were some hilarious parts in it. Like the entire inner monologue of the main zombie, R, at the beginning really caught my attention and made me giggle. It showed you that while he was full out zombie on the outside, on the inside he had thoughts but just couldn't communicate them.

"I'm so pale. I should get out more."

"I am lonely, I am lost. I mean I am literally lost, I have never been in this part of the airport before."

 Since we're speaking about R, why don't we just continue talking about him. I don't know how Nicholas Hoult did it but he made a zombie look hot. Props to his parents for creating this guy. At the beginning he was pretty gross, veins showing and eyes sunken in but as he became more "human" after he met Julie, they subtly started lessening the make-up and he started looking more like his incredibly attractive self.

And while he is nice to look at, I'd say he is extremely talented as well. He went for whole scenes without blinking and I have to say his zombie shuffle was very convincing. It looked kind of fun to do actually. His posture was so bad though, perfect for a zombie but horrible at the same time because it made me feel super self conscious about my own terrible posture.

The number of times I reminded myself to sit up straight...it was a lot.

For anyone who has seen it, did you notice all the Romeo and Juliet references? For anyone who hasn't, dudes zombies and Shakespeare how can this be? To be fair, it is very hidden, only made obvious to me when a balcony scene happened. But when you get the idea in your head, you start noticing all the other pieces of the puzzle and it all makes sense. It was mainly the characters that matched someone from Shakespeare's play:
R - Romeo
Julie - Juliet
M - Mercutio (Romeo's bestie)
Perry - Paris (Juliet's supposed to be husband)
Nora who wants to be a nurse - the Nurse
AND if you want to get all deep into the meaning of it, in Romeo and Juliet they both end up dead (spoiler alert) but in Warm Bodies they become alive at the end, both physically in his case and mentally in hers.

And while we're on the topic of noticing things (man am I good at segues right now) the actress who plays Julie, Teresa Palmer, looks so much like Kristin Stewart from Twilight it's insane. Just dye her hair brown and you're good to go.

Lastly but not leastly, DAT SOUNDTRACK. The music went perfectly with what was going on in each scene and really made things more memorable. I actually have some of the songs on my ipod now and when they shuffle on (pun NOT intended but still happily there get it shuffle like zombies but also shuffling your music) I can imagine the montage or whatever that went with it. Good job sound people. Pat on the back. Gold star. I just really enjoyed all the songs, ok.

All in all, this ZomRomCom was pretty sweet and pretty funny.

J Z

math teacher material

Y'all know or heard of Jay Z right? He's a successful rapper, married to Beyonce and all around G.

The reason I am describing this guy to you is not because I am so into his style and music and just want everyone in the world to hear about it, it is because my math teacher has the initials J.Z. and everyone calls him that, teachers and students alike.

I find it really, really, extremely funny because he is the furthest thing from Jay Z. First of all, he's a math teacher. Little different than a rapper.

SIDE NOTE: You don't even know how many times we have tried to get him to rap but he refuses so my theory is that he's secretly an amazing rapper and practices in front of his mirror into a hairbrush every day.

Next, he is so socially awkward that it's hilarious. Not to mention that he's already hilarious on his own, bringing up random facts and using weird examples in class every day. Not the same as the swag the real Jay Z has going on.

Some examples of his funniness:

"This homework will be 5% inspiration, 90% perspiration and 5% deodorant."

"Your presentation  needs fun-ness. Wear silly hats. Also I might look at the content."

"I have 2p....what's so funny?"

"There's no fire and I can't find it!" 

So he officially has the Best Nickname Ever because it came about naturally from his name and because it doesn't suit him so much that it does.

Memory Jar

Perhaps you've seen this while scrolling through Tumblr. Or perhaps your not hipster enough for Tumblr since that is where most of them reside. Either way, that's where I saw it first and I COMPLETELY fell in love with the idea.

The premise is that you get a jar/box/holding receptacle (it really doesn't matter, mine's a Kleenex box so you really can't get any lower than that.) and put little pieces of paper with all the things you want to remember. Any little moments that made you smile, giggle or cry in a good way. Any conversations you don't want to be forgetting any time soon. Any events that really made your day.

I like putting funny quotes I heard during the day, any achievements I've managed to complete and anything that brought a smile to my face.

So as you do that, the papers build up and you've got yourself a boxful of memories to remind you why life, yours in particular, is awesome! You can reread them at the end of the month, year or whenever you're feeling down or just need a laugh. It totally helps keep your memory fresh on all those things that you never want to forget.

Heck yes grainy phone camera pictures.

Don't be insecure girl

Own that ponytail.
Work that updo.


Where your boyfriend at?
Is he tall? Is he hefty?
Is he coming back?


In case you don't know what I'm spewing, this may help you out.

Can I have your number? Can I have it? Can I have your number? Can I? Can I?

These are classic lines that work in any and all situations.

Also: did you know Darrell is played by a girl?

Google Translate is Life

If you have not discovered it yet, Google translate is pretty much the best thing ever. You can do so many things with it that are either productive or just plain amusing such as:

Sound smart by speaking in a different language. Impress your friends by simply translating a word or phrase into some other language and slipping it into everyday conversation. When your co-conversationers ask what in the world you just said, casually explain that it means this in this language. You'll sound smart and well-educated.

Be grammatically correct. If you've got a project due in French, Spanish or Elvish, no sweat, Google translate is actually pretty smart. I'm not saying it will, without fail, be exactly and utterly perfect every single time you use it but it sure is helpful by giving you different suggestions and all that. (Something to note is that I'm very sure that they don't offer translations for the Elf language yet. Or that it's taught in school. But you never know so I just kind of threw that in there.)

Play the Translating Game. If you have never tried this out, you don't know what you're missing. Basically, what you do is translate a word or sentence into a random other language, then translate whatever you got from that into another language and so on and so forth. By the time you go back to English, it will be completely different and quite hilarious.
For example, I translated "I have two cats, named Oreo and Gingersnap, who like to chase balls of fluff around the house and are super crazy" to Japanese, got a whole bunch of Japanese characters and, when I translated it back to English, I got "My name is super crazy like a ball of fluff to chase around the house and Gingersnap Oreos have two cats." Crazy, right?You can do even more languages to mess it up even more.

Sometimes you stumble on something so random like when I translated "fox" into Polish, got "lis", translated that back into English and got "November".
This is great to do when you're bored. Kills time instantly.

Make the voice that reads it out speak to people. This really creeps people out when you turn up the volume really loud and make the voice say something random. They don't know where it's coming from and it isn't a voice they recognize. It's really funny to watch their reactions! The only downside is that there is a limit to the amount of words you can make it say. But you can just feed the voice short sentences and then the sky's the limit!

The above reasons are why I think all you need to live a fulfilling life is Google translate.

Missing: Toothepaste

Just now, a catastrophe struck.

We ran out of toothpaste.

Does that even happen in this day and age? We normally have a drawer absolutely stacked with extra toothpaste and then all the members of our family have their own tube. I guess we were all running out at the same time and didn't think that there wasn't any toothpaste in the replenishing drawer of destiny so we continued along our merry way of usage of toothpaste and ran out. 

Like, if you had a toothpaste detector, you would not find a single drop of toothpaste EXCEPT for this random half finished tester biodegradable toothpaste I discovered just sitting under the sink cabinet. It pretty much saved the day until we could get to a store and buy a buttload of toothpaste slash like 4 tubes.

This is my story.

How wasteful

I guess the moral is to know the true value of toothpaste before it's too late.

Instead of "Good" #6

Awesome.








Why? http://thecontentsofmy-brain.blogspot.ca/2012/10/instead-of-good.html

Nice One, Self

So this thing happened to me today.

I was sitting with some people for lunch and a guy offered me some of his root beer. I refused since I don't like it and that's all fine and dandy but I refused it with the words "It's brown. I don't like it." Of course, my friend just happened to be from India.

I was just stating a fact. It just so happens that all the pop I dislike is brown-coloured. So instead of numbering off pepsi, coke, root beer and all that jazz, I label them all brown drinks. No biggie.

But in the end it was fine, he called me racist and I protested and then we made some jokes and no one's feelings got hurt.

Where's Finnick?

Odair he is.

This joke made my life.

See, even Sam thinks it's funny

What I Look For In A Boyfriend

They must not spontaneously combust.